So, Goodbye...

The weather outside isn't good and that is why I arrived home a little bit late. Thanks to our professor,Ii had my phone charged (Whatever!hehe). At least I was able to reach our home just before the clock strikes 10:00 in the evening. I did the usual things every Friday when I arrived at home: change my clothes, proceed to the kitchen and look for foods, eat, wash the dishes and sit down in front of the television and watch obliviously. Actually I just turned on the television but i didn't watch it, I just listen to it. Texting takes over (laughs).

I noticed some minimal changes in our house. I noticed that we already have lanterns and Christmas decors (whatever they are called). It is not a usual thing we do whenever Christmas is approaching and the view made me a little pensive. tss. I am not used to that view in our house, at the very least of course. And that reminded me one thing - we are again back to the good old days. Just when my father and I would have been the only living thing that is breathing inside the green house. I am speaking of course about the days when I have time to go home and spend the days with him. whew.. My auntie just left last Wednesday (23rd of September). That means we are back to basic, sardines are luckier than us, they are at least 3 or 4 inside that small can. But anyway, it would not be that long.. it will just take about a year or so and then poof! three again, then few months.. 2.... Well, that's how it goes for us.

I guess, goodbye is really inevitable. it doesnt' matter if it's permanent or just for a moment. No matter how hard we try to hold on, forever and always we will hear it or we will say it. But i believe it's never the end and it will never be the end. Along the journey, we will meet certain people which will remind us of the old people that we are able to know along the way. but let's be able to differentiate the good old ones and the new ones. I just hate GOODBYES. There's always someone who are left behind and someone who moves forward. But I guess, some of the best life lessons can be found in goodbyes. (smiles)

Ciao.

Alienated

Being lifted from almost two days of truly dreadful moments and awkward silence (well, just for me i suppose), I've managed to breathe again normally. Never in my life that I could be so talkative and flawlessly entertaining when there are lots of people around - this one counts when I am caught in the middle of those people who I am not used to be with. In one way or another, I really get tongue-tied. It gets me a little bit too long to ease myself at certain people. That's why I chose to deviate myself from them within those two days that they were around while enjoying themselves of the full time vacation they could spend in our house.

For those torturing moments, I just stayed in my room for almost every time. And during those times that I decided to get out of my room, I just listen to their petty talks. Of course, no interruption from me. I just drew insignificant faces just when the situation calls for it. Guess, I would not be used into exposing myself into people, not too soon. (sighs)

Ignatians had their "reunion". (I guess, it is not appropriate to be called that way, I was not around anyway.tsk) I was not able to come because as I have mentioned above, we had visitors. I missed the fun which I tried to get out of my mind the whole time I was locking myself into my room while pretending that I was studying, that was all a ruse!

Enough of the babbling and the nagging and the ranting. At least, I have achieved to get a good rest somehow. Thanks, anyhow. I was alienated enough for the past few days but I am used to it at some point, really. Looking for more. Now, enough of the most mundane and typical things.(smiles)

I had a jump start today. I woke up just enough for me to catch up with our breakfast. Before I had reached the end of my luscious breakfast, my father reminded me that they would be away for about an hour or so. That would mean being alone with my granny in our house. Well, she's not really my granny but she's close to being one. She's staying with us until Wednesday if I remember it right. She is a silent type of person, and will mostly looks at you when you are talking to her. She seldom speaks a word which is alright for me because if she would be talking a lot, I really do not know how I could compromise. I prefer silence than a lot of chattering at times. (Ahm, it depends on people at least.) So, we had lunch together and I felt some sort of fulfillment within me. The thought of giving her food and taking over the things the she needed gave me a sense of responsibility for that short time. And what's surprising, we talked while we were eating our lunch. So, so nice for me.(smiles)

Ciao.